The Week’s Tweets (2010-05-09)

"What evidence do you have of lavishness at our winter meeting in Hawaii?" http://bit.ly/9oPxYi #
Killer app (well, hardware, technically) for parents: cell phone with earpiece built into phone, so it's always available. #
Don't most people use their last day to clean out their desk on the clock? #MyWifeIsCursedWithOneOfThose"WorkEthic"Things #
Is there anyone who understands less about American politics than Mark Penn? (No wonder Hillary didn't win.) #
When you find yourself reaching for the space or tab keys to format a Word document, please: get help. #
Cheerful at thought of wife's unemployment beginning in less than 8 hours! #
Why, in official documents, do people write numbers like this: "twenty (20)"? Is there really a risk of misunderstanding the word "twenty"? #
If the difficulty babies have sleeping were communicated more widely, people would probably stop reproducing. #
Surprised to learn that Newsweek still exists. #
What kind of homebuyer asks you to buy them CO2 detectors and a new toilet handle? #
Who started calling Tea Partiers "tea baggers," anyway? The Tea Partiers: http://bit.ly/coHXxe #
Changing Coen would be easier with the assistance of one of those big, burly orderlies from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. #
Clarifying and simplifying an organization's jumbled, dispute-prone, committee-written employee manual. And I could do it for you, too! #
"The [cop's girlfriend's son], who activated the car's emergency lights, was not authorized to drive the patrol car." http://bit.ly/agK0AL #
Hint for the day: you know that thing people say that sounds kind of like "mute point"? It's really "moot point." #
“I am all into national security. … I want to stop reading these guys their Miranda rights." http://nyti.ms/a6iSXC #
Grover Norquist just doesn't know how much he doesn't know. http://bit.ly/dkg3lA #
Does this still need saying? Yes: "Borrow money to buy things that go up in value. Consumer debt is not your friend." http://bit.ly/btvsxl #
I love how Montana cops are referred to in some technical sense as "peace officers." #
McArdle isn't ALWAYS wrong: "why is Joe Lieberman willing to share citizenship with Charles Manson but not TS bomber?" http://bit.ly/cL1p5I #
"He used a cannon to protect his home and office. " http://bit.ly/bD0zm4 #
I can't quickly think of a more cowardly, embarrassing national politician than Joe Lieberman. http://bit.ly/a3qGRS #
Ur-foodie James Beard's philosophy: "Feel free and take a fresh look. My emphasis is on options. My motto: 'Why not?'" http://bit.ly/cvySkC #
Oil spill: can anyone direct me to on-the-scene coverage of rescue/cleanup efforts, describing sea conditions, etc.? #oilspill #deepwater #
Car-bomb suspect trained at Pakistani terrorist camp, will ask for tuition to be refunded. http://bit.ly/cZumep #
Can't think of a commercial that makes me want to patronize a business less than the Ruby's Cafe/"you're so good" ad. #missoula #
"If you want 2-parent families with stable marriages, bypass Sarah Palin country for Nancy Pelosi territory." http://bit.ly/h9176 #
And in other signs of decline, not only does the Today Show exist but they are drinking "meat cocktails" on it right now. #
Will people ever stop saying "give a shout out to," or are we just stuck with that one? See also: "give props to." #
If you read only one essay today in which someone whines about how hard parenthood is, make it this one: http://bit.ly/9bzvR8 #
"[S]tates that voted Republican were by far the biggest beneficiaries of federal spending." http://bit.ly/dht5DU #
Tort-reforming Sessions advises Gulf Coast residents to sue BP. http://bit.ly/dht5DU #
Passenger claims to be alien, requests to fly plane. http://bit.ly/d8kQWD #
Why don't we just let the free market clean up the oil spill? http://bit.ly/dht5DU #
Why can't people just do what they are supposed to do? #
Hell hath no fury like a FEMA director scorned. http://bit.ly/aEy6b6 #
Until today's conv. with the pest inspector, I never knew there were so many different things a person might want to kill. #
Thought for the day: if we had to have an oil spill, at least it was from a company that makes heavy use of the color green in its ads. #
And now to return to editing 100-word sentences of legalese! #
Reasons to have children: drink all the coffee you want with no trouble falling asleep! (In early years, at least.) #
GOPS's "damn" race problem: "If seeking diversity cookie, damned either way. If trying to learn, blessed either way." http://bit.ly/9NrCDK #
Boston water-main break turns coffee into "liquid gold." If you can't understand why, you obv. haven't had yours yet. http://bit.ly/d35jAR #
To be fair, the AZ immigration law just got "less draconian." http://bit.ly/ciWR3e #
Oh, sorry that I was just muttering into a digital recorder while staring at the playground. #
Obama "beats" Leno at standup comedy-but then, so does the average house plant. http://bit.ly/d6HZnK #
"Sovereign squatters" a national movement: http://bit.ly/awoLl0 #
My latest Went West column: What's so hard about parenthood? http://bit.ly/9bzvR8 #

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